Well, you're not. Neither am I.
First off, "not good enough" is not the same as "not good." I'm sure you're good.
There are two "not good enough"s. A real one, and an artificial one. The real one states the obvious. I'm not good enough to compete in the Olympics. I'm not good enough to cut an album or win an Oscar or be selected for the space program. I'm just not. I remember being eight years old and realizing, on my own, that my artistic ability meant that I would never be good enough to draw Spiderman for a living (at the time, I thought that was the coolest job in the world. There was a cut, and I hadn't made it).
Many people spend their whole lives being told they're not good enough, for all the wrong reasons.
Too fat, too thin, too tall, too short, too shy, too forward, too cerebral, too emotional, too gay, too straight.
By being told we're not good enough, we're really being told we don't conform to some external ideal. Obviously this is an absurdly false criteria, and ultimately toxic.
The "antidote", as presented in popular culture, is that you're perfect the way you are. God don't make no mistakes. Celebrate the awesomeness that is you. You go, girl. If anybody can't handle you, it's their problem, not yours.
This, too, is toxic. It's not true. You're not perfect just the way you are. You're flawed, you have faults and habits and prejudices and blind spots, and those keep you from loving and accepting love, from living in the fullness of your own ability and abiding in your integrity. You have work to do. We all do.
So what to make of all of this? Both "you're not good enough according to some external ideal" and "you're all that and a bag of chips" are archonic traps, usually designed to sell you something. A diet, a yoga matt, or a latté as a reward for being so magnificent. Both are about exploiting our inner dialogue to provide you with easy answers, not deep questions.
"Know Thyself", as a philosophy and directive, is what differentiates both of these traps from a path to your own integrity. It's not an easy answer, but an ongoing conversation.
You're good, but you're not good enough. Yes, you're a spark of the infinite divine. But you're also a bunch of other things – angry, possessive, frustrated, lazy – that get in your way of abiding in your authentic self. You're not good enough, yes, but you're not alone in this, and through a lifetime of patience, perseverance, contemplation, listening, study, forgiveness, effort, humor, humility and love, you are constantly unfolding your authenticity, getting closer to that spark, and expressing it.
That's precisely what that lifetime is for. It's okay. We're all doing this together, whether we recognize it or not. Know Thyself.
